Me: I could kill for a pizza
Him: I could kill for a piss!
Me: I feel we have different needs right now
Another one of those “speaking of which” nights when we lie in bed and talk aimlessly about anything and nothing, like one does, when one want to talk about ones day with the man one loves:
Me: So I watched this documentary about the mating habits of leopards, and…
Me: NO! L-e-o-p-a-r-d-s!
Him: Oh! Yeah. That would have been weird. A documentary about the mating habits of the lepers of the Serengeti…
Me: *Turns off light*
In bed, about to fall asleep, his hand lands on my head.
Him: Oh, that’s your head?
Me: Yes, that is my head
Him: Troll Herbert?
Me: No! I said “that’s my head”
Him: Who the fuck is Troll Herbert?
Me: I don’t know! I said “THAT’S MY HEAD”
Him: What? That doesn’t sound anything like Troll Herbert
Me: I KNOW
In bed, about to go to sleep, sharing a pillow, face to face, talking about our day:
Me: You know, I heard about this travel agency today th..
Him: *bursts a saliva bubble in my face*